“I will never forgive him for what he did!” Have you ever said that to yourself about someone who deeply hurt you? Imagine if you are in a relationship and you are cheated on. It would be hard to forgive. Right now, the families of high profile figures like Tiger Woods, Governor Mark Sanford and former Senator John Edwards are walking through this.
When someone you trust lies, physically abuses, verbally intimidates, tricks or uses you – it hurts. It causes emotional injuries that swell up into resentment, anger or bitterness, which all lead to unforgiveness.
What can you do when someone hurts you? 1) Bury it and never talk about it again. 2) Sever the relationship ties through divorce, quitting the job or ignoring the person. 3) Get revenge and make the person pay.
Is there a better way? Yes. Forgiveness. The person who has hurt or injured you emotionally is a “debtor”. They owe you. They owe you an apology, the effort to make things right or just something for the pain they caused. Forgiveness means you choose to “write off” their debt so you are no longer demanding the person apologize, make things right or do something to take away the pain.
Why forgive? First, because it is realistic and pro-active. In real life, the person who hurt you probably will not or simply cannot make things right on your terms. Therefore, forgiveness takes the first step and forgives rather than waits. Second, forgiveness heals. Only forgiveness can heal the resentment, anger or bitterness. It is a self-healing medication that you have the power to give yourself. Otherwise, you will carry the injury for the rest of your life.
The ultimate example on how to forgive is found in God. You and I hurt God through our sins. They were an offense and angered Him. As a result, we became a “debtor” to God. Even so, in an act of amazing grace and mercy, He took initiative to provide a way for our forgiveness. He sent His Son, Jesus, to pay the debt for our sins against Him.
I pray that we can learn from God’s example. As He extended grace and mercy to us who offended Him, may we extend the same towards those who have offended us. Jesus said, “For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you” (Matthew 6:14). In Him may you find hope for today.
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Victory though Defeat
College basketball fans live for “March Madness”. It is about this time a particular name is remembered each year – Coach John Wooden, the legendary coach of the UCLA Bruins.
He is remembered for the coaching success at UCLA, that most sports historians say will never be matched or likely even rivaled. It is a voluminous set of records. The ones most well known are the ten NCAA national championships in 12 years, 88 consecutive wins over four seasons and 19 conference championships.
Many fans of Coach Wooden, 99 years old, would say he has been a winner throughout his entire life. As a player, he won championships in high school and college. As a coach, he had an 81% winning percentage covering 40 years of coaching along with the UCLA championships.
When you look beneath the surface of Coach Wooden’s resume, you can see he was not always a winner. He has known defeat. During the state title game of 1927 for Martinsville (Indiana) High School, he missed a key shot and lost the championship. Wooden says, “Losing that game was the most disappointing thing that happened to me as a player.” He started coaching in 1932 at Dayton (Kentucky) High School. His first season was six wins and 11 losses. It took him 28 years of coaching through the high school and college ranks before he won his first title. Then at UCLA in 1964, he finally captured his first of many national championships.
Victory often requires that we first walk through the doors of defeat. Then we find that which appeared to bring defeat actually launched us through the doors of victory.
Centuries ago, Jesus faced a torturous crucifixion upon a wooden cross. Political leaders, religious leaders, His disciples, family and friends thought He had been defeated. Jesus faced the cross and those around Him with perspective and resolve. When He died, it was a long, dark day. The sense of defeat was all around.
Then Sunday came. After three days, His tombstone was rolled away and He came out – alive! Angels told those who came to His grave mourning His death, “Why do you seek the living among the dead? He is not here, but has risen” (Luke 24:6). Out of defeat came victory. The cross, which looked like it was going to be a symbol of defeat, three days later, became the greatest symbol of victory the world has ever known.
What has defeated you? Bring it to the cross of Christ. Lay your sin, pain and failures before Him in faith. Through Christ, find victory in your defeats. May that be your hope for today.
He is remembered for the coaching success at UCLA, that most sports historians say will never be matched or likely even rivaled. It is a voluminous set of records. The ones most well known are the ten NCAA national championships in 12 years, 88 consecutive wins over four seasons and 19 conference championships.
Many fans of Coach Wooden, 99 years old, would say he has been a winner throughout his entire life. As a player, he won championships in high school and college. As a coach, he had an 81% winning percentage covering 40 years of coaching along with the UCLA championships.
When you look beneath the surface of Coach Wooden’s resume, you can see he was not always a winner. He has known defeat. During the state title game of 1927 for Martinsville (Indiana) High School, he missed a key shot and lost the championship. Wooden says, “Losing that game was the most disappointing thing that happened to me as a player.” He started coaching in 1932 at Dayton (Kentucky) High School. His first season was six wins and 11 losses. It took him 28 years of coaching through the high school and college ranks before he won his first title. Then at UCLA in 1964, he finally captured his first of many national championships.
Victory often requires that we first walk through the doors of defeat. Then we find that which appeared to bring defeat actually launched us through the doors of victory.
Centuries ago, Jesus faced a torturous crucifixion upon a wooden cross. Political leaders, religious leaders, His disciples, family and friends thought He had been defeated. Jesus faced the cross and those around Him with perspective and resolve. When He died, it was a long, dark day. The sense of defeat was all around.
Then Sunday came. After three days, His tombstone was rolled away and He came out – alive! Angels told those who came to His grave mourning His death, “Why do you seek the living among the dead? He is not here, but has risen” (Luke 24:6). Out of defeat came victory. The cross, which looked like it was going to be a symbol of defeat, three days later, became the greatest symbol of victory the world has ever known.
What has defeated you? Bring it to the cross of Christ. Lay your sin, pain and failures before Him in faith. Through Christ, find victory in your defeats. May that be your hope for today.
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Haiti: God Is There
Jean, 13, was having fun kicking his soccer ball around when it turned into a nightmare. Suddenly the ground began moving underneath his feet and buildings started collapsing, including his home where his parents and five sisters were. The Haiti earthquake on January 12 took the lives of Jean’s family, making him an instant orphan.
Before the earthquake, Haiti’s population was 10 million with 46% under 18 years old. Out of that number, the United Nation’s reported there were 380,000 orphans. Following the earthquake, Jean and thousands more children have now dramatically increased the Haitian orphan population.
Nearly every year since 2000, there have been terrible floods or hurricanes that took thousands of lives, including large swaths of parents. For years, through natural disasters and many other causes orphan numbers have been growing.
In the midst of this orphan crisis, there is hope. According to the Joint Council on International Children’s Services, there are 187 licensed orphanages in Haiti that are caring for thousands of children. Many of these are operated by Christian missionaries, who have been transformed by the love of God and are compelled to go and demonstrate the same love they have been shown. These orphanages not only provide onsite care but work to find loving families who will adopt children. Immediately following the earthquake, the State Department said 300 American families were waiting to adopt a Haitian child.
The staff at these orphanages and adoptive families are being “God with skin on”. Rather then standing at a distance, separating themselves from the hurt, injustice and potential danger, they voluntarily run right into it.
Where was God during the earthquake? He was there. He was there long before and still is. One place you can see Him are the orphanages, each worker being His hands and feet.
Maybe you have had an earthquake in your life. Through a series of bad choices, your world has come crumbling down around you. Now, even in a sea of people and activities you feel lost and alone.
God, through His Son, Jesus Christ, and some people He may have placed in your life, comes and calls you by name. He is not standing at a distance. He is close, patiently and compassionately waiting, “Seek the Lord while he may be found; call upon him while he is near; let the wicked forsake his way . . . for [God] will abundantly pardon.” (The Bible, Isaiah 55:6-7, ESV)
The God of heaven, who created you and me, is calling. When you place your total trust in Him, you are instantly adopted and welcomed into His family, the family of God. He becomes your Father and those who follow Him become your brothers and sisters. Come into the family of God and find your hope for today.
Before the earthquake, Haiti’s population was 10 million with 46% under 18 years old. Out of that number, the United Nation’s reported there were 380,000 orphans. Following the earthquake, Jean and thousands more children have now dramatically increased the Haitian orphan population.
Nearly every year since 2000, there have been terrible floods or hurricanes that took thousands of lives, including large swaths of parents. For years, through natural disasters and many other causes orphan numbers have been growing.
In the midst of this orphan crisis, there is hope. According to the Joint Council on International Children’s Services, there are 187 licensed orphanages in Haiti that are caring for thousands of children. Many of these are operated by Christian missionaries, who have been transformed by the love of God and are compelled to go and demonstrate the same love they have been shown. These orphanages not only provide onsite care but work to find loving families who will adopt children. Immediately following the earthquake, the State Department said 300 American families were waiting to adopt a Haitian child.
The staff at these orphanages and adoptive families are being “God with skin on”. Rather then standing at a distance, separating themselves from the hurt, injustice and potential danger, they voluntarily run right into it.
Where was God during the earthquake? He was there. He was there long before and still is. One place you can see Him are the orphanages, each worker being His hands and feet.
Maybe you have had an earthquake in your life. Through a series of bad choices, your world has come crumbling down around you. Now, even in a sea of people and activities you feel lost and alone.
God, through His Son, Jesus Christ, and some people He may have placed in your life, comes and calls you by name. He is not standing at a distance. He is close, patiently and compassionately waiting, “Seek the Lord while he may be found; call upon him while he is near; let the wicked forsake his way . . . for [God] will abundantly pardon.” (The Bible, Isaiah 55:6-7, ESV)
The God of heaven, who created you and me, is calling. When you place your total trust in Him, you are instantly adopted and welcomed into His family, the family of God. He becomes your Father and those who follow Him become your brothers and sisters. Come into the family of God and find your hope for today.
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