How to Support Someone Who Is Suicidal

“In the last 20 years, suicides have grown by 40% in America. Over 100 people every day are choosing to end their life this way.”

Ed was carrying a load on his shoulders, the heaviest of his life. He did not know how to face it, so he turned to a reliable friend, Mr. Alcohol. One night he was so overwhelmed he prepared himself to end it all. He went to the store and purchased the biggest case of beer he could buy then walked to the railroad tracks, sat down and began drinking. Fortunately, his life was spared and when I met him as a young pastor in my mid-20s and heard his story, I invited him to live with me. During that time, I came to know Ed as a friend and was privileged to be Jesus to Him during one of the lowest points of his life. 

In the last 20 years, suicides have grown by 40% in America. Over 100 people every day are choosing to end their life this way, from teenagers to middle-aged men. As a follower of Jesus, I firmly believe this is a spiritual battle at its core. The raging battle in the mind of someone considering suicide; trying to decided whether to live or die, is a battle between good and evil. Jesus once said, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.” (John 10:10) And who is the thief? The devil. He is the enemy which seeks to ruin lives, where Christ seeks to bring newness of life. When suicidal thoughts come, it is evidence of a desperate spiritual battle. 

Knowing that, how can we help fight the lies of suicide, by bringing the goodness of God to someone who is struggling? 

1.    Pray. Call out to Almighty God seeking His divine involvement. There is power in simple, but desperate prayer. “In my distress I called upon the Lord; to my God I cried for help. From his temple he heard my voice, and my cry to him reached his ears.” (Psalm 18:6)  

2.    Share God’s Word. Like prayer, there is supernatural power in God’s Word. Read it to someone walking through great struggles. Text it to them. Use the Word like a skilled weapon to fight back any suicidal thoughts that may cross their mind. 

3.    Engage. It is vital to engage with those going through times of distress, for these times may precipitate suicidal thoughts in some. God says to “Be kind to one another…” (Ephesians 4:32) We show kindness to people by spending time with them. Invite someone in crisis into your home, or go to their home. We also can engage people through phone calls or video chats saying, “How are you holding up? I care about you and I am always here for you.”   

4.    Invite to church. Offer to someone under tremendous stress, to come to church and into the presence of God. Let them hear His Word taught, listen to the singing of God’s praises, and be around others that can join you in praying for them.  

5.    Offer professional help. Observe when it is time for the person you are concerned about, to meet with a wise and godly pastor or Christian counselor. But if that cannot come soon enough, do not wait! Immediately call 9-8-8, which is a suicide hotline that provides 24/7 free and confidential help. 

Each of these steps demonstrate what it means to “love your neighbor as yourself,” which Jesus taught. Through loving one another and the power of God, we can try to prevent suicide. Because Jesus has died and risen again conquering all evil, our hope is in Him. We cannot control everything that a suicidal person is determined to do, but we can control what we do, by reaching out to those under heavy burdens.  

A prayer for you – Lord God, open our eyes to family members and friends who are struggling today. Help us to show kindness and walk with them through their dark valley. Deliver them from any evil thoughts of suicide, and let them see the light of life in Christ. In Jesus name. Amen. 

America’s Suicide Epidemic

“It is a lie that one believes suicide is the only answer, when in truth, it only makes a tragic situation permanently tragic.”

Sandra was in her mid-20s when we attended the same church and were part of the singles group. She had a beautiful smile and a bright personality, but one day life came crashing down on her when she received word that her dad had killed himself. The news impacted our group as we grieved for her devastating loss. (Image by Freepix)

White middle-aged men, like Sandra’s dad, are the number one age group for suicides in America. And when it comes to our youth, according to the National Institute of Mental Health, “Suicide is the leading cause of death among young people in the United States.” And suicides are not just affecting our youth or our empty-nester dads, but all of us. In 2021 and 2022 suicide numbers have risen across nearly every age group, resulting in suicide being the 11th overall cause of death for Americans.

What is causing this epidemic that is snatching away our children, parents and grandparents? As a Christian minister I view this important subject through the lens of the Bible.

One of the ten commandments God gave us is “You shall not murder.” (Exodus 20:13) Suicide is the act of self-murder, however, God is the author of life, “God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female…” (Genesis 1:27) Because every person was fashioned together by Almighty God, and has the highest intrinsic value among all His creation, He would never then lead a person to destroy what He originally created and called “good.”
But why would someone take their life? It might be a soldier dealing with the trauma from military service. A teenager battling online bullying. A dad who lost his job and cannot provide for his family, or the stress of someone gambling away their life savings.

Nothing escapes God’s sight, “You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from afar.” (Psalm 139:2) God sees and knows all. Therefore, He knows of the soldier’s struggle, the teenager’s wrestling and understands the dad’s crisis. And though God is filled with mercy and compassion, under no circumstances would He condone suicide.

So where does this idea come from? God provides insight saying, “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it? (Jeremiah 17:9) The thoughts of suicide come from a heart that is broken. It is a lie from out of this brokenness, that one believes suicide is the only answer, when in truth, it only makes a tragic situation permanently tragic.

Is there hope for those battling these demonic lies? The Bible says, “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.” (Romans 15:13) Yes! Suicide is preventable. It does not have to be the answer. For God Himself is the hope their hearts so desperately need.

God defeated these lies of suicide when He sent His glorious Son to us, “For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him, should not perish but have eternal life.” (John 3:16) Jesus came to die and rise again to fix the broken hearts of every man and woman, and destroy the lies they are believing, with the truth. He once said, “If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” (John 8:31-32) This freedom is available to anyone who is willing to turn from these lies and by faith to Christ with all their heart.

If you or someone you know is battling suicidal thoughts, have hope today. Seek out a local pastor, Christian counselor or immediately call 9-8-8 which is a suicide hotline that provides 24/7 free and confidential help.

A prayer for you – Lord God, rescue our nation from the plague of suicide. Overcome these lies with the truth, that in Christ every person can be set free. Bring troubled souls this hour to call upon you for help and deliver them O God I pray. In Jesus name. Amen.

It’s Time to Start Being Responsible

"One day all humanity is going to have to accept personal responsibility before God. Every person will stand before Him to give an account for their lives."

Were you one that got up for school when you were told or did you just lay there as long as possible? What about when it came to picking up toys? Did you easily comply with picking them up, or did you pretend like you did not hear? How about brushing your teeth, did regularly brushing come easy, or did you fight doing it every morning and evening? (Image from istock)

These are all small lessons of responsibility for young children. If boys and girls are taught responsibility in their early years, through the influence of their parents or grandparents, then they will be responsible adults. If a dad can teach his little boy to be responsible to make his bed on his own, then one day he will grow up to be responsible with more important things; like his money. If a mom can instruct her young daughter to be responsible in doing her homework, then one day she will grow up to be responsible with more important things; like the direction of her life. If small children are taught responsibility in the small things, then they will grow up to be responsible in the bigger and more important things.

Left to themselves, irresponsibility is normal for all children. That is why it requires the intentional and persistent effort to build responsibility into the child at home. The Bible offers this insight, “When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways.” (1 Corinthians 13:11) What is one childish way? Irresponsibility. Consequently, the sign of adulthood is taking responsibility.

But what if a child was never taught this? Then he or she is likely to grow up and become a reckless, ungrateful and disobedient man or woman. They grow up to become their own worst enemy.

There was once a story of a man like this. His name was Jonah and God told him, “Arise, go to Nineveh, that great city, and call out against it, for their evil has come up before me.” (Jonah 1:2) But Jonah had a strong will and resisted God, so he “rose to flee to Tarshish from the presence of the Lord.” (Jon. 1:3) Instead of Jonah accepting the responsibility and going, he became irresponsible and ran. As a result, he put his life and the lives of others in great danger. Finally, at his lowest point he came to his senses and said, “When my life was fainting away, I remembered the Lord, and my prayer came to you, into your holy temple.” (Jon. 2:7) Eventually, God’s patience taught Jonah responsibility, where he accepted God’s call and went to Nineveh where tens of thousands of lives where changed.

One day, like Jonah, all humanity is going to have to accept personal responsibility before God. Every person will stand before Him to give an account for their lives, and there will be no excuses or blaming others. God says, “The son shall not suffer for the iniquity of the father, nor the father suffer for the iniquity of the son.” (Ezekiel 18:20) This means, we will all answer before God individually; not as a couple, a family or church, but one on one with the Creator God. Therefore, the guilt of our parents or others, will have no bearing on us before Him. Yes, others influence us, but ultimately, we are the ones who are responsible or irresponsible in the choices we make. It rests at our feet alone.

A prayer for you – Lord God, I pray that people will raise up to take personal responsibility for their lives and eternal souls. Bring them to see the urgency of ordering their lives after the ways of God and to take responsible steps to do that today, beginning with placing their simple faith in you. In Jesus name. Amen.